Thursday, August 9, 2012

The Real World (in Reality)

"Saturday- Barbara Ann and Betty were fighting about who had larger breasts. It resulted in a whipped cream fight that went deadly. The cops were involved.

Sunday- Jose went on another bender, getting drunk and having gay sex on the pool table in front of the entire household. And the crew. And even neighbors were peeping in through through the glass windows. It definitely didn't help that his parents were visiting from Puerto Rico. And were playing pool.

Monday- Today was a fairly quiet day, until the screaming at midnight. Apparently Bubba was sleepwalking around the house in nothing but his boots and cowboy hat. And then he mistook Ahmed's bed with the toilet and proceeded to "golden shower" him. He wasn't nearly as Quiesha, who happened to walk by, see his bright white ass and start screaming at the ghost of her long dead daddy."---   The Real World, Fiction

      Having roommates changes everything. Especially going from a seven room house to an apartment. Granted, "the apartment" is a three story townhouse which is very nice but there is still an adjustment. For the most part, the move has been a purging process, allowing us to start fresh. We gotten everything from the house moved into two rooms at the townhouse. But now comes the conflict . . . the furniture wars, the space issues, and did I mention the cat that wants to clain every part of the house as his?

     At this point, I am waiting for Frankie, our cat, to serve us an eviction notice stating he can't live in this small a space. And this is after two days of him living here. And I'm scared, because he's a scarey little shit when he needs to be.

      And the boxes. who knew we had this much crap? And most of it, we just couldn't imagine leaving behind. Unpacking is a daunting and right now, very offputting and put off task.

      Thank you to our new roomies who helped us move. And to our old roomie, you da bomb.
And for all those who saw we were moving and didn't care, well you probably won't be reading this, so Oh Fucking Well.
     So far, the most drama seen was on TV, watching Roseanne (season 5, the one where Fisher beats Jackie, and Roseanne and Dan come to the rescue).

     I think I like the new place, and our roommates, despite us all being so different. But only time will tell. Here's hoping there is lots of fun, without so much "reality".

1 comment:

  1. I wish I could say it's a drama free zone, but I think those are just fabled places. They don't really exist.